Yesterday went to......

pot!

I started off the day in a happy mood. Made myself a smoothie for breakfast/morning tea and I even had a bottle of lemony warm water to drink first thing in the morning. I hear it helps clear out your system.

Ate my healthy salad for lunch and I even had corn on the cob with a little butter as a treat. Later in the day, I started to feel the need for chocolate so I spoke my mind and my work friends came to my rescue reminding me that I don't need it. I even posted a message on the WW website for help to remove the temptation of wanting chocolate and the girls on-line were very supportive. In the end, I asked for a banana from a work colleague and proceeded to eat it quickly and I was obviously hungry and bored at work.

However, the problem was on the way home from work!

Even though I know better, I stopped into a cheap supermarket on the way home from work and bought myself a mini pizza worth something ridiculous like 9 points, a mini garlic bread worth another 7 1/2 points and toffee cheesecake well in excess of 10 points.

Needless to say in my binging state, I started eating the cheesecake first whilst I waited for the pizza and garlic bread to cook and proceeded to watch mindless television and drink softdrinks.

The question really is here, why would a sane person who is willingly and openly trying to loose weight do this to them selves?!?!?!

In my defence, the only answers I can think of right now is sadness, disappointment, stress and loneliness.

A few days earlier, I had asked my best friend to visit me whilst on holidays. Whilst she appears very eager she has started to express her husbands concerns about her meeting me for a holiday without him. Apparently he is he's studying and they have a trip planned for their wedding anniversary. Hence the sadness that she may not be able to come and also the disappointment that I won't be able to see her as we live so far apart.

The stress is due to an task that I had being putting off for a few days and therefore left everything to the last minute.

And the loneliness is broken down into to two parts, first being physically alone in the house at the time of eating and secondly emotional loneliness because my partner/friends don't fully understand my feelings and therefore pressuring me to suppress my emotionally feelings or to behave in a certain way.

Today is much better and I am on the mend (slowly), so lets see if I can stay on track and be focused.